Sunday, June 23, 2013

This is why...

Oh, hey, little bloggy... I have missed you (again).  It's so weird to see that I was sooo pregnant just a few months ago. My, how life gets crazy when you have a baby.  I feel like I'm kind of stepping out of the cave, blinking my eyes, wondering what's been going on for the last few months.

So yep I had a baby, he is the best.  He is so mellow and sweet and smiley.  He's awesome.

Three kids is busy.  We are adjusting.  I think I've lost a lot of caring about the little things though.  There is stuff you just can't worry about anymore.

I don't care that the middle child runs around in just a diaper most days.  I don't care that my four year old dresses herself crazy.  I don't care that we eat peanut butter and jelly for almost every meal.  I don't care that  I can't meet everyone's needs instantaneously... because they will be met.   I have to triage needs.  Poop trumps hunger.  Hunger trumps tired/fussy.  Fussy baby trumps whining about toys.

There are things that I'm trying not to care about... (maybe I'll get over it when we have another kid... which will be a long while... just sayin')  like having a really messy house, not being on a schedule yet, feeling frumptastic, not being in shape yet, not having "me" time, not being on top of everything... like returning phone calls and paying those pesky bills.

Things will fall in place more and more, but it's hard to be patient with myself and getting used to the new normal.

Some days I struggle being a stay at home mom.  Society doesn't value it.  People don't look at all the diapers you change in one day and say "Wow, way to go!".  I struggle with wanting to feel like I'm really making a difference... I have to remind myself that I am.  A huge difference to three little people who need me.  World change at the grass roots level is harder than it looks.  Sometimes I have to remind myself why I'm doing what I'm doing, but sums it up rather nicely... this is why I have three kids, this is why it's important: